People have an odd double standard when it comes to asking for help. On the one hand, we will readily help others as it makes us feel good doing so. However, when we’re the ones in need, we have difficulty asking for help ourselves.
There are many reasons why we have a fear of asking for help, especially at work. Maybe we don’t want to appear to be a burden to our co-workers. Or perhaps we just want to be self-reliant.
Besides these reasons, why do employees have difficulty asking for help at work? In addition to this, how do you go about asking for help when you need it? Let’s find out.
We Don’t Want to Appear Vulnerable.
One primary reason employees find difficulty asking for help is their fear of appearing weak in front of others.
This is especially common to new employees looking to prove themselves to their manager and team.
Sometimes, this fear of vulnerability stems from an employee’s imposter syndrome. They’re afraid that if they ask their co-workers for help, they’ll think that they aren’t as skilled as they appear and thus lose all respect for them.
We Want to Be Seen as Self-reliant.
Self-reliance is one of the most valuable skills to have as a remote worker and one that is particularly sought after by employers. It means we’re proactive, capable of working with little to no supervision, and can make decisions on our own.
But when we’re too used to doing things ourselves, it can be awkward and embarrassing to ask for help, like it would undermine the image of self-sufficiency.
We Don’t Want to Owe Anyone at Work.
In other cases, another possible reason some employees have difficulty asking for help is due to their trust issues regarding owing people. We feel uncomfortable owing our co-workers, because it makes us feel compelled to return the favor next time.
We’re Afraid of People Rejecting Our Request for Assistance.
Nobody likes getting rejected. And no, I’m not pulling a hugot on this one. Another reason why we have difficulty asking for help is because we’re afraid that our co-workers won’t help us.
For some people, such a rejection is like an attack on their self-worth. Thus, they become hesitant to ask for help because they don’t want to risk a painful rejection.
That said, there are many reasons why one’s co-workers may not be able to help them. Maybe they were also busy with their own tasks. Or perhaps they also don’t know how to solve your current problem.
We Don’t Want to Bother Our Co-workers.
Sometimes, in our efforts to be helpful to our co-workers, we remain quiet about our problems, even when doing so affects our productivity.
This is especially true when our team needs to accomplish several tight deadlines, as everyone else will be busy doing their tasks.
How Do You Ask For Help From Your Boss and Co-workers?
It’s hard to admit that you need help from others, especially if you’re not that confident yourself. Fortunately, it’s not impossible, either.
Here are some tips on how to ask for help should the need arise.
Make a List of the Solutions You Tried and Any Other Potential Solutions to Your Problem.
The first step in asking for help doesn’t start with contacting one of your teammates. It begins with listing down all the solutions you’ve already tried and other potential moves you can carry out.
Having one prepared allows your team to better understand your problem and help you form a solution. It also displays the extent of your problem-solving skills and shows that you’ve tried hard to solve the issue by yourself before asking for help.
Find the Right Time to Ask for Help.
Before you ask someone for help, check if they’re not otherwise engaged.
Unless it’s an emergency, avoid approaching your co-workers if they’re also busy. And if it’s really urgent, you can message them and ask if they can schedule an appointment with you.
Identify the Best Person to Approach for Your Problem.
If you’re having trouble knowing who to ask for help, start by asking your closest co-worker or someone whose job is specifically to assist you, such as HR or IT.
Be sure to compile all your questions first before approaching them. This allows you to save their time and yours by avoiding so many follow-up calls for additional questions.
Frame Your Request for Help as a Conversation Than as a Transaction.
One strategy you can use when asking your co-workers for help is to word your request like you’re inviting them to talk instead of just directly asking for help. Doing so increases the likelihood that your co-worker will help you and fosters a better working relationship between you.
Instead of saying: “I need your help.” to your co-worker, you can say: “I have a problem I need help with. When can we talk to discuss what we could come up with together?”
Be Specific.
To avoid wasting your and your boss’s or co-worker’s time helping you solve your problem, be specific about your request.
When asking your question, include the urgency of the problem, an overview of your task, which part you’re struggling with, and what solutions you’ve tried already.
This helps your co-worker or boss to better understand your situation and provide an appropriate solution to help you.
It’s Never a Sign of Weakness to Ask for Help.
No man is an island. No matter how skilled or experienced we are at our tasks, there will be times when we will need help. However, some factors, such as the ones mentioned above, make it difficult to ask for assistance.
Fortunately, there are many ways to overcome these obstacles and get the help we need. This way, you’ll be able to gain the confidence the next time you need to ask for assistance.
If you need help looking for online jobs, Remote Staff is here to help. Our jobs list has a wide range of positions available for you to choose from. If you didn’t find the job you want today, you can try again tomorrow, as we regularly update our list.
Good luck!